yujin13. (tree)

by yujin13.

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1.
01:54
2.
02:45
3.
02:10
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5.
02:24

about

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released May 30, 2009

recorded in 2008 by christopher hopkins at earthbound recording in chula vista, ca.

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(10:39 Records) Chula Vista, California

Chula Vista (San Diego)-based independent music vagabonds. Check out our sites for music reviews!

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Track Name: a new year.
awkward situations seemed to find their way to me
imagining what could have been; regretting what will never be.
analyzing every second, counting every breath
sweaty palms, a racing heart, and strong yearning for death
to strike me down and take me from this momentary agony...
am i too content with this familiarity?
this person that i know is there just waiting to burst out of me.
this confidence inside is something i must show.
i long for the day when i'm the first to say "hello."
preoccupied with arguments between me, myself and i
a subtle underlying of unwillingness to try
fearing what is thought to be an unrequited love
but from the very bottom, the only option is to rise above...
what is it that i want? who do i want to be?
will i tear down these walls i've built so you can really see
just who i really am, this person that's inside?
staring straight back at this world, there's no reason to hide...
i will not be satisfied with familiarity
and if i make mistakes i know that i am who i want to be.
i have nothing to prove to you (but) there's one thing that i know:
today's the day that i will be the first to say "hello."
Track Name: empty home.
i wake up in this empty home.
i wake up, and i'm all alone.
why didn't you tell me you were gone...?
i have been waiting for so long.
i never really knew you
i don't want to say goodbye.
i closed myself off from you, it's so difficult to try.
will you please forgive me?
i still want you in my life.
i never really knew you
i don't want to say goodbye.
i want to accept the thing you tried to give to me:
a second chance-
one more redemptive opportunity.
please, i don't want to feel so alone.
Track Name: (10:39)
every day, i wonder how i would have turned out
if i hadn't done the things i did the day before.
i sit alone and think if i did the right thing;
if my decisions could have, should have
meant anything more.
if i didn't do it, who would i be?
i ask if this is really me.
i contemplate this life and wonder if i'm truly free.
the end of doubt-the end of shame
the end of taking all the blame.
but until then, i'm waiting for your voice to say my name.
every day i look around
then, at the ground at my own two feet
and wonder why i look, but i don't see.
sometimes, i choose to walk alone
but i don't complain, because i know
that there are people in this world that are less fortunate than me.
what excuses have i left to say?
when i look at myself at the end of the day
i wonder if it was really supposed to happen this way.
so many nights staring at the ceiling;
i try to understand why there's just emptiness i feel inside.
i try to fight this hollow feeling.
please help me to see the truth...
i'm waiting for the day where i don't have to turn away.
i'd look into your eyes and say that everything's ok.
but until then, i'm waiting...
Track Name: a better place.
i tried so hard to bring you to a better place
and all i wanted to see was a joyful look upon your face.
an utterance of praise is all i want to hear
but these words just proved to be insincere.
how could you say i didn't love you...?
i never put myself above you.
i sacrificed myself; i want you to go far.
i hope you're happy where you are...
i welcomed you with open arms.
i never meant to cause you harm.
a hardened heart is what i get for unrelenting warmth?
listen to me, please-i want you to know one thing before you leave:
i never want you to return-a lesson that i sadly learned
from someone that i loved so much yet caused me so much grief
you clenched your teeth behind that smile.
my love for you, you just defiled.
i hope you're happy where you are.
Track Name: fall.
i was invincible...until i fell for the first time.
i waited for these wounds to heal.
the scars remain, the marks reveal
the pain i used to feel;
and how i've fallen time and time again.
take a look inside my mind as i retrace the steps i took:
i desecrate the empty pages of a neverending book.
pen in hand, i turn the page, ready to start the story of my life
...but i write nothing.
so i rip it out, tear it to shreds
and think of what to write again.
the more i've fallen on the ground
the more i've lost, the less i've found,
the more i think, "what have i done?"
the more i've lost, the less i've won.
i let the past catch up to me
...this empty page is all i see.